Why Some Dogs Seem Fine… Until They Aren’t
- Deb from Busy Pawz
- Jun 24
- 3 min read
Updated: Jun 26
Have you ever had one of those days where everything feels fine - until it’s suddenly not?
Maybe you spill your coffee, snap at a friend, or burst into tears over something tiny… not because that one thing was a big deal, but because your “stress bucket” was already full.
Our dogs are the same.
They might look like they’re coping, wagging their tails and going through the motions but underneath, their emotional bucket might be filling fast. When the bucket overflows, that’s when the barking, biting, destruction - or even total shutdown - starts to show.
What Fills the Bucket?
Every little stressor your dog encounters, no matter how small, adds a drop to their bucket. It could be:
A loud noise in the distance
A rough interaction at the park
A skipped walk
Changes in routine
A visitor arriving unexpectedly
Even your own stress (yep, they feel that too)
The bucket can slowly fill without you even noticing. And because dogs can’t say, “Hey, I’m actually not coping very well today,” we often miss the early signs.
Warning signs your dog’s stress bucket might be full
Here are some common red flags:
Sudden overreactions to things they usually handle fine
Clinginess or withdrawing
Excessive barking or whining
Destructive behaviour (especially if it’s new or out of character)
Pacing, restlessness, or hyper-vigilance
Freezing, growling, or snapping seemingly “out of nowhere”
Remember, these aren’t “bad behaviours.” They’re communication. They’re your dog’s way of saying, “I’m not OK right now.”
How to help your dog empty the bucket
Just like us, dogs need time and support to offload stress. The goal isn’t to eliminate stress entirely (that’s not realistic!), but to prevent it from building up to the point of overflow.
Here’s how you can help:
💤 Build in proper rest
Dogs need more sleep than we think ... up to 14 - 18 hours a day, especially when they’re young, senior, or under stress. Make sure your dog has quiet, undisturbed spots to truly relax (not just doze while the kids are running around!).
🎾 Use enrichment wisely
Food puzzles, sniff walks, scatter feeding, calm games are all great ways to help your dog decompress. Just make sure you’re not accidentally overstimulating them with too much at once. Enrichment should soothe, not hype them up.
🫶 Create emotional safety
Predictability helps dogs feel safe. Stick to routines where you can. Advocate for your dog in tricky social situations, and don’t force interactions with people or other dogs. Calm, confident leadership from you is what helps your dog feel secure.
🌿 Keep the environment calm
Soothing music, natural calming scents (like lavender), or even energy healing and massage can go a long way in creating a space where your dog feels at ease.
Bonus Tip: Don’t wait for the overflow
Sometimes we only make changes when things get bad but your dog’s behaviour is often the last clue, not the first.
If your dog has had a big day, build in recovery time. If they’ve had a tough few weeks, look at what you can take off their plate.
You don’t have to wait for a meltdown to make things easier.
Final Thoughts
Dogs don’t explode out of nowhere. There’s always a build-up - an overflowing stress bucket we didn’t see until it spilled.
By learning to spot the subtle signs, creating opportunities for release, and gently shifting how we support our dogs day-to-day, we can help them live with more ease, trust, and emotional resilience.
Sometimes, the best thing we can do is… less.
Thanks for reading!
As always…
Throw your dog a treat from us!
Deb & the Busy Pawz Crew xo
📚 P.S. If your dog’s behaviour has changed or you suspect their bucket might be full, check out my Chaos to Calm ebook - it’s full of practical ways to help your dog regulate, rest, and recover.
🎧 P.P.S. Prefer to listen on the go? This blog is also available as a podcast episode! If you’d rather hear me chat through the stress bucket concept (with a few extra stories and tips), grab your headphones and tune in.
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